Phobia

Sunday, January 06, 2013 , , , 4 Comments



"You know I am scared of heights...!  Please don't force me.", terrified Rekha hid behind Ram.

"Rekha, you have to deal with this fear.  I don't want you to stare at the escalator, waiting for a hand to guide you.  I don't want you to be dependent on others all the time.  It is a mental block.  Throw it away and you will enjoy the freedom. Please just this once, step in before me, I am there behind you.", Ram pleaded.

Visibly shaken, Rekha stepped in to the moving escalator, fumbled and closed her eyes.  From the gentle nudge behind her, she knew she crossed one floor and hurriedly stepped out and stood for a minute to rest her shaking knees.

"Now, that wasn't bad was it?  You did it, Rekha.  Are you ready for more?".  Rekha looked up and saw Ram's face watching hers hopefully.

She nodded hastily and walked the few steps that carried her to the next stretch of escalator.  Flushed, when people around looked at her and wondering what her problem was.  

"Open your eyes and try to focus and concentrate on something before you, ignore the sides, dear." Ram whispered.  Slowly she opened her eyes and saw a pale blue shirt before her and with a slow grin she turned to see Ram and to her horror she saw that the she was two floors up and that moment, she felt the floor rushing towards her. 

Ram's hand shook as he and few others lifted Rekha and rested her on the floor.  Like magic, a water bottle appeared and when cold water hit her face, Rekha grimaced and slowly opened her eyes. She realized what had happened and turned to Ram and asked him if they could leave.  

Their descent down was loaded with silence.  They parked and entered the coffee shop and chose a private corner. Rekha felt Ram's eyes on her and nodded weak.  Slowly, tears slipped from her eyes and her shoulders shook with silent sobs.  Ram moved to the seat next to hers and held her shoulders and after 10 minutes, she straightened herself and gave a small smile.  His heart went out for her and cursed himself for forcing her, knowing her phobia.  One hour and still the air between them was tensed.  Ram felt that she needs to be on her own for a while and signaled for the bill. That day was lost as far as she was concerned and Ram didn't want to prolong it any further. They left.

Another day:

Rekha found herself being jostled as she entered the busy building. People running about buzzing in activity and preoccupied with their own worries. She slowly made her way to the alcove which contained the lift.

'LIFT UNDER MAINTENANCE', Rekha stared at the board for a minute and turned towards the stairs that loomed before her.  4 floors and open on both the sides. Her legs froze.  Ram in a critical condition waiting for her on the 4th floor.

Slowly she walked and went near the staircase.  She heard Ram's whisper, "I don't want you to be dependent on others all the time.  It is a mental block.  Throw it away and you will enjoy the freedom. Please just this once, step in before me, I am there behind you."

Holding on to the rails, she started to climb.  One floor up and she started to sweat.  "Now, that wasn't bad was it?  You did it, Rekha.  Are you ready for more?". Second floor. More sweat, breathless and nauseating. "Open your eyes and try to focus and concentrate on something before you, ignore the sides, dear."  She started to climb staring at the steps before her.

'ICU' the board read.  Rekha's hand shook as she opened the knob and the sister said, "Not more than 5 minutes, time for the doctor to come for rounds."  Rekha nodded and searched among the people before she  found Ram, three fourth of his body bandaged, face battered, torn and swollen.  Rekha scared to even touch him fearing it would hurt.  She called out his name and said, "Ram, I climbed  4 stairs and if I can do that, am sure you will be out of here soon."      

Did she imagine or she really saw his lips twist in to the minutest of smiles?

Hold on!
Hold on! till I cross this bridge...
Hold on!
Hold on! till I reach for you....

Can't you stop?
wait for me to hold your hands and walk...
Will you turn?
Take me in your arms and kiss....

viji suresh

Some say he’s half man half fish, others say he’s more of a seventy/thirty split. Either way he’s a fishy bastard. Google

4 Candles:

Too good.. Actually reading this, I too have this fear of escalator..Hari holds my hand, while we board..all these 6 years..

I was reading it with all smiles, but got a shock at the end.

Well presented..

what are husbands for? :) thanks devs for your comment.

Harsha said...

Well written Viji.. One small step but a great gesture.. :)

Thanks harsha :) a lot!

wisdom comes with experience

At one, I learnt crawling was fun. At forty one, I still feel crawling is fun #blamemykneesnotme