Dios Mio time eternal

Monday, July 13, 2009 9 Comments





















Imagined for a moment
a life with out you
Don't have a clue
what I would do.

With out you, I don't exist
wherever I turn, things remind me of you.
You are the answer to all my prayers
Be with me Dios mio time eternal.

My love would never waver a bit
till the day I cease to exist
I would fight, cry or throw a tantrum
just remember I'm ensnared
in the clutches of this doldrums

Twenty hours a day I work
sleep eludes me, when I set to rest.
want to hear a soft word from you
when that doesn't come, it throws me out of gear.

I hate to stay angry with you.
Just this once give that lazy smile
Just this once give me a tight hug
Just this once ask me how I am?

viji suresh

Some say he’s half man half fish, others say he’s more of a seventy/thirty split. Either way he’s a fishy bastard. Google

9 Candles:

Brosreview said...

I can see the maturity in your poetry Vijji. Yes I can! I mean, I can imagine you writing this a few months back in a more loose style. So, I refer to it as maturity.

This is very well written! The feel is there, and it is just right. It is not too much to be a pop song nor that vague to be a heavy metal song.

My only concern is in Line 6. Specifically, "things remind you". Shouldn't it be, things remind me of you. No offence.

Great work! Keep them coming, now!

Viji said...

AJ happy that you liked this. this poem was not written now... i wrote it almost 2 months back and i forgot to publish it, so I copied it from there and published it now.

yes it should be "things remind me of you", thank you for pointing it out. corrected it.

This is not one of the collection I promised to write. I am still working on it, I doubt whether I will have the guts to even publish it...

Shadow said...

from the heart this is....

Cognizance said...

Viji,Brosreview gave all the comments, though there is nothing new from my side,i like to add one thing...i can get the real feel

Viji said...

thanks shadow, Sundar :)

Sundar said...

No words to tell viji.
Each and every line is filled with a feel.

Viji said...

thanks asha :)

Chriz said...

a desperate lover who couldnt leave his lady love... vice versa :) neat and beautiful

Viji said...

Thanks chriz :)

wisdom comes with experience

At one, I learnt crawling was fun. At forty one, I still feel crawling is fun #blamemykneesnotme