Friday, April 15, 2011 4 Comments

My blog is celebrating friends this week.

Universal laws on friendship:

Friends whatever shape, size, age enjoy fighting, hugging, smiling, crying, gossiping....

Even after long silences, disappearances friends can pickup threads anytime..

Few questions I had and my friends answers:

I sent two text messages to few of my friends.  Here is the content of those messages and their response.
How long does it take to make friends? Can you give me two instances where you felt comfy and close to a person in less than a moment after you got introduced and a friend where it took months/years to get close.  Who is closer to you now? The friend you made in a moment's time or a year?  Can you really trust your life with a friend? For eg: You are going abroad, you forgot a medicine which is mandatory for you to live.  Will trust a friend to buy it and hand it over to you in the airport or will you hurry and buy it yourself?
If it's not too much to ask how would you define a friend? Your friend?

okie peeps! here I publish my friends thoughts on friends and friendship...


"A friend over the year. Yes, I will trust my life with a friend.  But once again this in from my perspective.  Will change from person to person.  For me it takes time to make one, but once made remains for years. Samy is one friend I made in an instant but got close over a period of time. You also I got close over time. Not in an instant and will remain close for years."The beauty of friendship can be anyways.... it can be made in a moment or years... can be anything and everything.
For me a friend is someone, I totally depend on and one who can depend on me.  On whom I can demand anything and one who can demand anything from me.  I have very few friends... Samy, Arun and you.  That's it.... Others are just acquaintances.


How long does it take to make a friend?

Depends, Sometimes it takes a moment and sometimes it takes years and.

Who is closer to you know?
It is very natural for my wife to be my closet friend,….but still I don’t include her in this list .It will be my School friends.

The friend u made in moments time and In a year?
Purna (My school friend from UKG but become my friend in college ….Instead I spoke to him for first time in college :D ): It took less than a hour to be his friend forever.
Yesha ( My X Colleague )

Can U trust your life with friend?
Deft. I can (and to some my closet friend I have shared my Cr. Card details also J )

Define Friend?
Happiness, Jadoo ki Jaapi (Hugging tight),Sharing, Bank, Love, Pulling each other legs, Unlimited Fun, Be with u in your worst time to share your tear or share the best moment of your life, Talking whole night and still having enough patience to talk more, Eating Maggie @ 2am ,24x7 Advice channel, Standing together in Principals office, Teasing you and still understanding your first love , Talking movies, Playing (cricket,volley,TT), waking up @ 3 in night to say I am not getting sleep, Laughing uncontrollably till your stomach hurts and tears are out , Traveling around , boozing (Sharing a quarter) ,Partying all night, Standing their as one of your  family member……………………………………and so many things viji ( Each and every point I have defined here is what my friends are …and I am lucky to have the best friends ever and most of them forever in spite wherever we go………can’t thank god for more than that ) Love my friends.


  1. Well I hate to drag him into this but Ram was one person I took months to like and have him as my best friend.  Though he has been given an up gradation in my life now, he still remains the closest and best'est' friend of mine.  The other person is Prabodh.  Took me months and maybe a year and half to make him a close and dear friend of mine.  The friend I made in a year thought the ones I made in moments hold a very special place and are the most unforgettable people.  You can trust your life with a friend, with respect to your example.  I would prefer getting it for myself.  But if circumstances are such that it cannot be done by me, then I would entrust it up on my friend.
  2. Friend would be a bum chum who would quietly share a dish prepared by me and irrespective of how horribly it tastes, he/she would still compliment it :) and encourage me to cook more :) On a serious note, friend would be somebody to whom you could vent out all your frustration and happiness (I know that's clichéd but that's the way I see it) without any expectations... that person who would be on your mind first when you think of sharing something good/bad...

"Phew!! you got my thinking nerves into action! phhbtt!"

2.  Hmmm... I'll define friend as a belief and an extension of famly.  Just like how a family cannot leave a person even though he or she is bad.  Friend also should stand by your side at the time.  You hear a bad thing about me, you gotta come to me and ask and then I should be feeling comfortable to tell him even if I did something wrong.


1. Two friends... One whom I made in a very less time and he made me comfy and the first time I spoke to him, I knew he would be my good friend.  In another instance it took years still I can't call her my best friend. So it differs from person to person.  If I think of a person, I would trust him/her wih my life, leave alone the medicine.  There are ones who needn't tell that they care for me I really feel them.  I'm lucky here I got 7 of them - Gokul. Hari, Manoj, Nami, Satheesh, Sundar, Viji.
2. Friend: Who understands that you are not well or hurt or upset even if you act that you are alright.


Tough to answer Viji, but I can trust him/her to buy life saving medicine when needed.
A person whom I can depend upon.


     2. Nanben da!!! ( Friend / meaning of the word 'friend')


I would really be close with the ones with whom I have been in touch for a long time... not really with the ones who became friends in a short time.  I would definitely believe my friend to get the tablets rather than me doing it.
A few close people who knows, who I am exactly.

"Viji, I became close with my friends at the very initial meetings.  I became a close friend of Siva after I met him, may be thrice.  There are few friends, who got closer to me after a period of  time.  I am closer to both the types.  I trust my friends."

Added on 17th April 2011

Me: Thought of answering my questions.... an afterthought....

Seconds, minutes to get acquainted, but to make friends it takes months then years.  Family are those who leap in an instant and be with you during tough and easy times, but we take them for granted... why? 

When a friend do the same thing as your sibling or wife do, we appreciate it more than the family? is it justified? when it comes to a friend even when you are tired, you leap and do it, while pulling a long face and complaining tiredness to the family. Why?

Coz family are people who are related to us by birth and it is not unnatural for them to shower affection and be with you during difficult or easy times.

Friends, who do not have a clue on how you looked when you were born, whether you are rich or poor or brilliant or dumb don't count.  They see you as a friend and other things are pushed behind. Its sheer luck to have a friend who does not have an inkling about you but still care for you the way your family does.

For me it took years to make friends... 

Kanaks, friends from my school days, she calls me, meets me and keeps in touch with me all these years, even when I faced tough times in my life and busy days.. holding even more responsible position than mine, she finds all the time in the world to talk to me and keep in touch with me and I feel guilty for not volunteering the call or meeting. 

Manoj my best and closest friend, just thinking about him brings a smile and waves of affection and nothing matters and literally i did trust him when it came to life saving medicines not once but twice and will continue to trust him in future.  He worries about my health, about my career, about my family, about my losing weight more than me... I trust him with my debit and credit cards and he trusts me with his....He was the one who initiated to bring Viji out of her shell.  I used to be very reserved and didn't trust men in general.  Manoj was my first follower in my blog, he was the one to criticize open that the poetry I wrote lacks feelings and "stick - in - the -mud" types.  Those harsh criticisms made me write better.  I can't thank him enough for everything but since he doesn't like thanking... here I stop! 

Shiv though years younger to me, it took just few meetings, few months to become his friend. he brought in few changes in me in just few months which I doubt i would have ever achieved in my life time if I had not met him... thanks to him for pointing out facts and fictions and the fun in breaking the f(act)ictitious wall I tried to build around myself. Amazing guy! Be it music, a Java program, friendship his passion is just amazing... I want to see you as a great musician one day! But no! I wouldn't trust him with my life saving medicine, as if there is an issue or a bug in his coding he will forget the medicine, viji and the whole world... but still I would love him no less...I know lots of "fews" when I describe him but he is a friend I made in record time.

How to define a friend?

For me Friend is just not a person, I can rely on (like in A/C, Refrigerator, Electricity)... Friend is someone who can bring a smile or tear when I am stuck in Antarctica wearing a thin t - shirt and torn jeans or stuck in Sahara desert with miles and miles of sand dunes with half a bottle of water or standing on the tall peaks of Scotland/Tibet without a map.  Just the thought of Manoj, Shiv, Kanaks will make me fight the roughs and hurry up to meet them again and I am damn sure I will fight and nothing can keep me parted away from my friends.... 


Some say he’s half man half fish, others say he’s more of a seventy/thirty split. Either way he’s a fishy bastard. Google

4 Candles:

Prabodh said...

Whoa...Lovely Post Viji. :)

Viji said...

Thanks Prabodh :)

where's mine. you didnt ask me. anyways nice post

Viji said...

@Devs didn't want to disturb you...i didn't want to take even a minute away from your twins :)

wisdom comes with experience

At one, I learnt crawling was fun. At forty one, I still feel crawling is fun #blamemykneesnotme